Amor Vincit Omnia

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    “Love Conquers All”. One of the most misinterpreted phrases of all time. People often take it to mean that finding your “true love” will make everything else fall into place. The stars will align and, together, you can conquer all obstacles and have a happy ending. We all know this to be folly. Love, as a magic potion, does not exist.
    I have known people that were madly in love when they got together, but life got in the way and they ended up separated or divorced after many years. They went on to marry other people that made them happy and were with them until the end of their days. However, they were never really able to totally replace the first love.
    How many people do you know that love each other but will start fighting after a few minutes together? I mean, there is nothing wrong with a little argument now and then, you can't leave things bottle up or they will fester and explode. The kind of fighting I am referring to is the kind that really hurts, when insults are thrown around and things are said that can't be taken back. Does that mean they do not love each other anymore? Perhaps, sometimes people stay in a toxic relationship because they are afraid of being on their own.
    This does not mean that I don’t believe in love or that “all” can’t be conquered. What I mean is that it takes a lot more than just love.
    I (along with my wife, of course) just celebrated 31 yeas of marriage, about a month ago. And I can definitely attest to the fact that, if all we had was love, it would not have been possible to stay together this long. It takes love, sure, but it also takes patience, understanding, dedication, respect, support and specially, lots and lots of hard work.
    Long term relationships, engagement, marriage, even friendships, take a lot of work and dedication. It is a commitment from both parties where they have the other person’s interest, as well as theirs, at the forefront of every thought and action. In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, till death do us part should not be taken lightly.
    Things happen in life, sometimes through no fault of your own, and circumstances change. If you are not prepared to live in a shack or a cave with the person you are considering spending your life with, then move on. Everyone should ask himself or herself before taking the big plunge, am I willing to push a wheelchair with him/her on it for the rest of our days?  Am I willing to cuddle in the cold with nothing but our own bodies to keep us warm? Am I willing to share a small piece of bread so neither one of us goes to sleep on an empty stomack?
    There are many more questions like those, but if the answer to any of them is no, don’t do it. Because let me tell you there will be times when one or more of those become a reality and you need to be prepared for it.
    Together, my wife and I have endured many things: the death of loved ones, financial difficulties, depression, professional disappointments and setbacks, and many more. If all we had was love we would not be here, together. We have supported each other through all of it. We have worked hard to overcome difficulties and disappointments together. We have seen each other through injuries, sickness, surgeries and more. We have done it with love, yes but also with dedication, patience and understanding, mutual respect and support but above all, hard, continuos, strenuous work.
    So go forth and love, but be prepared for the work!
    Can love conquer all? You tell me.
Until next time.



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